The End Is Near.. But What A Way To Go!

Yes, my loyal friends/readers, the end is near.... for Guiding Light. I have spent the last 9 months of my life sucked into this fandom in a way I have never been sucked before. Ooo, I realize that line was WAY dirtier then I intended. Oh well, I'll keep it in.

Today the show was pre-empted by the US Open. Now, I hate tennis with the passion of a thousand suns, so I am currently wandering around my office mumbling "No Otalia? WTF?" I am sure my students think I am insane.

Brenda is giving me the best birthday gift ever- Beatles Rock Band! I CANNOT wait to sit down and play it. I LOVE the Beatles, and from what I have read the it is a pretty sweet game.

So this weekend will be low key. I'm going to play Xbox, then my staff is coming over on Sunday for pancakes and bacon. I know- a very exciting way to celebrate my birthday, but it will be fun nevertheless.

Geek On.

One week until craziness

In one week Allendale, MI will be invaded by 18 crazy Otalians from all over. And when I say all over, i really mean it. Let me list the states and countries in which my friends are coming from:
Michigan (me)
Illinois (Mara)
Wisconsin (Gidge)
Indiana (Shiva, Nicole, and Michelle)
Ohio (Bronzey)
Kentucky (Kellie)
Tennessee (Katie and Beanie)
Texas (Engine and Sang)
Connecticut (Shortstack)
Pennsylvania (Foodie)
North Carolina (DiNovia and Torrence)
UK (Fletcher)
South Africa (Basher)
Australia (Keeva)

Yes, that is 19 people total that will somehow be fitting in my apartment. They aren't all sleeping here- most are going to the local hotel, but we are all going to be hanging out at my place to watch the finale of Guiding Light.

I am more excited about that then my 30th birthday. Maybe because i am not doing anything on my actual birthday- most of my friends here bailed on me, so I will spend the day doing what i want- playing xbox and chatting with friends. Maybe a Veronica Mars or Buffy Marathon?

Geek On.

Poor George....

So, I had a great and terrible weekend at the same time. I met up with my Otalia peeps down in Indy and Cincy, and when i went to get my car on sunday- George had died. And spewed oil all over his little gay engine. *sigh* Turns out i blew out my oil cooler. So I stayed with Shiva until it was fixed on Tuesday, then drove the 4.5 hours back. That was a VERY expensive weekend.

But you know what rocked? about 5 minutes after I tweeted that I broke George and was stranded in Indy, no less then 6 Otalia peeps (plus my awesome twin) all offered me money. This is why I love this fandom. Although apparently this is called "friends."

Otherwise, school has begun, and I am looking forward to a three day weekend of nothing buy chatting with friends and gaming. Rock Band 2, here i come!

Geek On.

Bring out the Funk

Thanks to all my friends who put up with my funk this weekend, including a hilarious tweet from Brenda and Nik about who brings the noise, and who brings the funk. It made my night.

I am very excited that my twin convinced Nik to get an xbox 360- then I convinced them to get Left 4 Dead and Rock Band 2. Muhahahaha, my evil plan is working! Of course, it just makes me want to move to Missouri someday.

So what is going on in geekdom? A few things, actually. Both Project Runway and Top Chef started last week, and I am thoroughly enjoying both of them. Team Rainbow is back in full force on Top Chef, and hopefully they can survive.

There are many new games coming out this fall, all of which having me drooling. Assassins Creed 2, Bioshock 2, Left 4 Dead 2, and my favorite, Mass Effect 2. So, that this means is that you all will NEVER see me online after 5pm, i'll be gaming.

Guiding Light is coming to an end, and with it, the Otalia storyline. I won't get into my intense dislike of the pregnancy storyline, but I still enjoy the entire show and will stick around for the ride. I also have 17 people coming to see me the weekend of September 18th, including 3 from other countries. It's going to be a huge purple dreams blast, and I can't wait.

Last but not least, I turn 30 in about 3 weeks. And no, this doesn't terrify me. I am just impressed that I lasted 30 years on this planet. Go me!

Geek On.

Melancholy

I have just been a weird mood the past couple of days, and it's finally hit me why. All my friends are so damn happy. Weird, huh?

To expand- i don't mean that happy friends piss me off- quite the contrary- I WANT my friends to be happy. I mean, who doesn't? I guess what's bothering me is that all my friends have recently become happy because they all started dating someone. *sigh* that always just puts me in a bad mood.

We hired more new people here at work, and both of them are married or in long term, committed relationships- making me ONCE AGAIN the only single person here. So, no one to hang out with, no one who wants to go try new restaurants, and sometimes what i think is worse- no one to come home to. Guess you never thought of me as a cuddler, huh? (and yes Brenda, Nik, Beth, Carolyn, and Krisana, I know this is where you tell me to move to Missouri!)

99% of the time I am ok with being single. I love my life, i have ways of doing things, and it mainly doesn't bother me. I guess it's when I see my friends all pairing off that I start to think- "What's wrong with ME? Why am I always the friend, but never the person people can see as more then that?" I guess there are various reasons.

Ok, my "woe-is-me" session is over In a few days I'll be back to my happy, go-lucky-self.

I wonder if any of my gaming friends are around tonight to distract me?

Geek On

Inspired? Not so much

So Brenda has been reminding me to keep up with the writing, but to be honest, I haven't been inspired much. So when do I FINALLY think to write something? Oh yeah, that's right- the busyist month of the year for me.

I won't go into my Otalia rant, because frankly, there isn't anything to be done anymore- the show is done shooting, and now we have one month to see what is going to happen. Good or bad, it's already done. Lets just hope I don't end up throwing anything through my tv!

Short recap of the geeky things I did this summer:

1. Met up with other Otalia friends in Team Midwest in Cincy. It was a blast!

2. Went to KC to visit Brenda and the crew- also very fun and they constantly try to get me to move to Missouri.

3. Did my 13th year as a counselor at Badger Girls State. It was not the train wreck I thought it was going to be.

4. Pick back up my gaming. I was slacking a LOT during spring.

5. Yep, that's about it. Now it's time for the school year to begin again!

Geek On.

Letter to mom

I wrote this letter last year, but I think it's worth reposting on this journal:

Dear Mom,

First off, I want to say I am not sorry to be the person you raised me to be or for who I am today. I am proud to be me, but in that process of being me, I know that I caused you a lot of pain and heartache, and so that is what this letter is about.

I am sorry I was never the girly-daughter you wanted me to be. I’m sorry that we never talked about boys and first dates and everything else that moms hope they do with their daughters. Even today I am hesitant to talk about my dating life, because I know deep down inside it’s not what you want for me.

I’m sorry that even something as simple as clothes shopping was difficult. I know you tried your best to get me into cute outfits and frilly dresses and wanted to show off your pretty, feminine daughter. That was never me. I’m sorry that every shopping excursion up until I was 15 was a long-drawn out process in which I wanted to shop in the boys section and you dragged me into the girls section. Even today, when I come home with a new shirt or pants or tie, I see, for split second, the shame and pain that you have for raising a butch daughter.

I am sorry I will never give you the big white wedding that you want. I know you had saved your wedding dress for me, but you know I will never wear it. Even if, by some chance, I manage to find someone I want to spend the rest of my life with, we will never have the wedding that my brother had. Oh, I know you and Robert and Robbie and some of the family would show up, but I know there is ½ the family that would not. I know that the family friends you and dad would normally go running to talk about the wedding to would not be receptive, even if you told them. You will probably mention something in passing, if you do at all. In your eyes, it will never be a “real” wedding. You made that very clear at Robbie's wedding that family members need to be married into the family, and although I know you didn't mean it the way it sounded, I am still hurt by that.

I am sorry that I am not the daughter you asked for, but I am proud to be the daughter you got. I hope someday, you are too.

Love,

Dany